Scott Dixon, seen here winning an unrelated reace, is your 2008 Indianapolis 500 winner. This makes it 39 years that the prestigious Brickyard race hasn't been won by either a woman or an Andretti. The New Zealander won his first 500 the year after he lost the IRL championship on the last lap of the last race.… »
What to watch while remodeling Bubble Man's dorm room...
• 5 p.m. — NASCAR: Coca-Cola 600, Concord, North Carolina. In a blind race test, what's more exciting: this race or the Pepsi 400? [FOX]
• 7 p.m. — NCAA softball: Georgia at UCLA. There's no crying in softball, but there's no by-laws applicable to sniffling.… »
Lakers reserve center Ronny Turiaf only plays 10 minutes a game, but as you can see by the video, the man babbles a good flibbidyfloo. And now we have a chance to Turiafify the vote on TNT's website. »
• Cristiano Ronaldo's new girlfriend does all the positions, and all you have to do is take her to parties and give her money. [Unprofessional Foul]
• Mike Piazza and Jeff Garcia are twins. And yet they look nothing alike. [The Big Lead]
• When skilled 12-year-old girl basketball players make the boys look bad, it's… »
Keeping with the obliviousness-to-rules motif — hey, it makes us feel better about ourselves — Dallas Cowboys running back Marion Barber III, esq. has made a name for himself by stiff arming the defenders in the face. Apparently that's always been a rule. But now the league will begin to clamp down on such reckless… »
Hopefully you caught wind of Major League Baseball's new directive to enforce rules that speed up the game, if from no other source, from Jim Leyland's awesome rant. But apparently the Red Sox didn't get the memo. Correction: they read it, they just didn't read it. »Because of this, hitting coach Dave Magadan was…
There've been a lot of Simpsons games throughout the years, few of them any good. The one that stands the test of time was probably the original arcade game. I recommend it today as you watch the Indy 500. So I know what you're asking. "Where am I going to find the original arcade machine?" That really isn't my… »
Justin Duchscherer was joking around before his start against the Boston Red Sox: ''I said, 'Those guys don't want none of me today 'cuz I'm going to pull a Lester on 'em,'' Duchscherer recalled with a grin. ''In the sixth inning, I was thinking, 'Did I really say that before the game?' '' Yes, Justin. Yes you did.… »
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who's hoping that Spring will eventually come to Chicago. Not that 40-degree weather isn't fun...in, like, December. When he's not hating the hell out of the Midwestern weather, he can be found doing a sunshine dance at Basketbawful. Enjoy!
There's no place like road. It… »
This probably wasn't the way to intimidate the Detroit Red Wings coming into Game 1 of the Stanley Cup finals. The goalie, his name is Marc-André Fleury, and there is a caution stripe on that step. Either that or they just mopped. »
What you missed re-creating the chase scene from Space Mutiny...
• NBA: Yeah, well, Boston still hasn't won two road games yet.
• NHL: Son of Samuel goes on massive scoring spree, dozens wounded, Red Wings at large with 4-0 win.
• MLB: Cubs won the first eight innings. Problem is, the dang thing went to 14.
Oh, and… »
There once was a man by the name of Stanley, who decided that average trophies were not good enough for hockey teams, so he went and sculpted a cup based on a napkin drawing by Nigel Tufnel. The trophy was supposed to be 35 feet tall, but he got his inches and feet mixed up. »
What to watch while shopping around for once-in-a-lifetime deals on infants...
• 7:30 p.m. — NASCAR: Nationwide Series, Conquest Auto Parts 300, Concord, N.C. Watch your favorite drivers in different numbered cars wail on lesser drivers! [ESPN2]
• 8:00 p.m. — NCAA softball: Georgia at UCLA. The fact that the pitcher's… »
Any mail client has it. Trash can. Deleted items. They all call it something different, but my God, it's right there. A half-terrabyte of data doesn't mean you save every freakin' Twitter message that comes your way. The Seattle Supersonics management might have gotten away with merely being hated in Seattle for… »